Many of you are already infuriated that I have the audacity to even question Superman’s awesome rock hard body, let alone imply that he’s fat. I’ve thought about it long and hard and this is what health magazines, television, movies and the gym has taught me:
- Superman eats like a normal person.
- Superman does not require a huge amount of caloric intake when he’s performing crazy Superman feats. He never stops for a burger when he’s travelling at the speed of light. He can run/fly around the world without even breaking a sweat.
- Superman rarely, if ever, lifts something that’s actually heavy for him. And even then, it’s like an aeroplane which is travelling at 300+ miles an hour right into him.
- Superman never actually exercises for the sake of exercising. He does perform manual labour, I’ll grant you that.
- Humanoids only build muscle through resistance training. Your muscles tear and repair in order to build.
- In order to get larger muscles, you must continuously lift weights which are heavier for you.
- There comes a point that your “natural” body will no longer get any bigger, irrespective of how much weight you push, pull or lift.
So, logically speaking, it’s safe to conclude that he’s consuming way more calories than he needs, meaning, he’d need to do way more exercise to burn off the excess pounds. The type of exercise where he’s working up a sweat, and that just seems to only exist when he’s fighting other Kryptonians.
Superman would have to do cardio exercise all the time in order to burn off the calories that he consumes, which he doesn’t. The man just does the normal superhero activity that forces him to be Superman. Otherwise, he’s trying to be Clark Kent and living a normal life whilst wooing the ever elusive Lois.
He’s also so crazy strong that well, he’s going to find it hard to do resistance training. What’s he going bench? A battleship? No, that’s easy for the man of steel. He needs to bench a mountain type structure, and that’s just not possible.
So, over the course of time, he’s just going to get fatter and realise that there’s not much he can do with his body. He can’t build muscle mass, it’s just not going to work. He can either eat very little, perhaps, like a snake, once a week? But I doubt that Martha is going to let that happen, she’s going to feed him three square meals a day, she’s a good middle American mother after all.
Therefore, Clark Kent would be a little fat with next to no muscle tone at all.
Yes, I feel the hate coming from you already. Please don’t hunt me down… I’m just trying to make sense of it all.
Ranter & Banter 