In honour of Netflix’s announcement of production for a 5th season of the incredibly timeless and funny Arrested Development, let’s go through our favourite top 5 reoccurring Non Bluths. For argument sake, we will also disqualify any Funkes, because, let’s face it, the never-nude Tobias is one of the best characters to ever be introduced to you. Let’s get started with season 1:
- Maggie Lizer – Julia Louis-Dreyfus
“Maggie Lizer, as in Maggie lies her ass off” and boy does she lie her ass off. A “blind” prosecutor whose guide dog is actually blind. And hey, she does miraculously get her vision back when she’s struck by a bible in court. The ultimate in divine intervention. Maggie also was the only external party who helped Tobias and Lindsay spice up their marriage. Who can forget that awkward kiss in the bathroom in season 2? That was so hot…
- Shirley Funke – Alia Shawkat
Yeah yeah, she’s a Funke, but Shirley isn’t quite a member of the family. She’s a controversial, crippled creation of Maeby’s. She a wheelchair bound, down trodden girl suffering from BS. She takes classes (M for married and S for single), gets giant cheques, and enters beauty pageants. This chick is on a roll, she’s got more cash than she knows what to do with. After all, she tipped George Michael $200 or six $20 bills. Math is clearly Maeby’s strong suit.
- Kitty Sanchez – Judy Greer
George senior’s long suffering assistant, mistress, ultimate cheer leader. She’s insane, she’s got the worst breast implants ever to grace the small screen and she’s proud. “Woooo! Spring break!” And a lesson for all, never promise crazy a baby, it will come back and bite you.
- Lucille Austero (Lucille 2) – Liza Minnelli
Oh poor Lucille 2, she’s such a nice woman. But never seems to quite catch a break. With her vertigo and love of Buster and all things Bluths, she sure knows how to make her way through them. If you know what I mean, nudge nudge, wink wink… cringe cringe.
- Gob’s wife – Amy Poehler
She’s a seal selling, Tobias loving, army enlisted dare devil. She’s got crazy written all over her, and true to form, Gob made a big mistake. The scene where she’s watching Dr. Funke’s 100% Natural Good-Time Family Band Solution is just gold. Her connection with Tobias’ Teamocil push is priceless.
Do you agree with our list? Who are your most memorable non-Bluths from the first season? “Steve Holt!”
Ranter & Banter 